Part 3 -Somatics and Mindful practiseHeidi Hadley
Change the language in your head
I have briefly outlined in the previous blog how we can continue to change the language in our head. What does this expression acually mean?
Due to experiences and the people we encounter in our life, our thoughts and beliefs can be created and moulded by their thinking. As we age and experience life, we encounter new people and their beliefs systems and personalities; which like us have been shaped from life!
If we have been hurt or bullied, we could continue this victim mindset into adulthood and be reactive to words and expressions. These expressions may not been directed in a cruel way, but rather we have interpreted or perceived it that way. It may be that we have had a sad history and in order to block any thoughts or feelings, we become so busy and fill our lives with activities to avoid thinking or pondering on these things.
The scenarios and situations are numerous. But how can we become more mindful and start to train our mind and body to become less reactive to situations?
It is human nature for us to spend most of our time living in the past or with the bombardment of 24 hour news coverage, worrying about the future. But what a waste of time, energy and our life! All we have is here and now. If we aren’t fully present, then we aren’t fully alive and living life to its fullest.
We can be our own worst critic. We can judge ourselves harshly. We can blow things out of proportion and spiral into being a messenger of doom with our internal dialogue. Take for example a friend who is walking on the opposite side of the road. We say hello, and they reply with a partial smile and half hearted wave. Do we react or do we respond? Do we ruminate? By the time we have walked to the end of the street have we created a whole scenario in our head? Do we have thoughts such as “right that’s it, I’m having nothing more to do with her.” Maybe we react with thoughts such as “she doesn’t like me. Nobody likes me. Why am I so unlikeable?”
This internal dialogue or language in our head is very negative and destructive to our self worth and belief systems. If we believe these negative thoughts, our subconscious mind will influence our soma (whole being/person) and our body will start to mirror what our mind believes. We start holding muscular tension and tightness in our body. Over time, we start to struggle and become trapped in a stiff, painful body with negative, detrimental thoughts.
How we see life and interpret it has a huge impact on our quality of life. Referring back to the friend on the other side of the road, there are myriads of reasons for her response. But it doesn’t always have anything to do with us. That person is navigating life and has their own challenges.
Mindfulness on a daily basis involves noticing thoughts when they occur and allowing them to float in and out of the mind without obstructing or questioning them. Our brain is and always will be busy processing, so to completely empty it, is not actually possible; it is controlling all areas of our body 24/7. Our objective is to gain a bit of piece and stillness from the various thoughts and emotions that run through our mind. When we develop mindfulness skills, we sharpen our focus, awareness and concentration. When we combine this skill with our personal Somatics practise, we allow a level of calmness to our mind. Plus the gentle release of long held muscular tension and pain which has resulted from living a very intense life starts to reduce with regular Somatics practise.
This is an area I have had to work on over the years. As a youngster, I would worry a lot. My dad would often say to me growing up, “Heidi, there is no future in the past. It is water under the bridge. Let it go.” He was correct, we cannot change the past. We can learn from it and grow. My mum would also say to me over the years, “don’t meet trouble half way.” This too was such a good piece of advice. Why waste time and energy worrying and meeting trouble half way? If it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, then I haven’t wasted my time.
Over the years and with lots of personal development and lifeskills coaching from a brilliant mentor Peter, I have and continue to allow my neuroplasticity to grow and change to create a more calm and centered life. Somatics has helped release stress and tension from my muscles, allowed me to alter my mindset and changed the language in my head.
So if you struggle with stress, anxiety, muscle aches/pains and tightness, regular Mindfulness with Somatics can help you. It can help you to reduce the stress and pressure in your muscles and joints and create a more calm and collected mindset.